In any town In any country go to any bar or tavern. Approach the bartender and ask for a Beer, Any other order will result in INSTANT DEATH……for some reason.
Sit down on the nearest stool and sip your drink. You will notice a unshaven man to your left wearing a football jersey. Do not look at him for more than a moment or you will suffer a fate worse than death.
Continue drinking. If you stop…..you will fail the trail. Upon drinking 1 8th of you 8th beer you may turn to face the man.
You are permitted to ask him this one and only question. ‘ Hey Brah do me a solid and hold my drink while I go have a piss’.
He will say ‘yes’ and then begin to speak to you something that resembles English. Go to the bathroom immediately .
If you stay and listen you will fail and will become his prisoner trapped forever.
Once you enter the bathroom you will suddenly find yourself vomiting profusely. Narrowly missing your good Levi’s. Once you finish vomiting enter you urinal. DO NOT glance at the mirror as you pass it.
In fact never look in mirrors.
As you finish urinating shake 2 times. No more no less. If you perform a third shake….. The demons will deem you ‘Playing with yourself’ and will drag you to hell. Now wash your hands or ‘Those pesky demons will GETCHA’
When you return to your stool the man will return your beer.
This is object no.69 of 538.
{{by| Kevin ‘the moleman’ mullan|link=www.crappypasta.com/holder-of-the-beer/}}